Give / Give

I-DO-Marriage-Series.jpg   Marriage.   This is such an immensely important word to me.  My husband and I have been married 27 years and we can both honestly say that we love and respect each other more today than when we wed.

We feel that marriage is a sacred thing. It is not to be taken lightly. We are far from perfect. We both have our annoying habits, our disagreements, our disappointments, our struggles.  The one thing that never changes is our love for one another.

Marriage is not a give and take. It is not a 50/50 agreement. It is not simple or easy.

Marriage is give and GIVE. Each of you needs to give 100% to the other without expecting anything in return.  The OTHER person’s happiness is of the utmost importance to you. You will sacrifice freely for your spouse. You have each other’s backs and support and cheer each other on.  Marriage is a lifetime of ‘I dos’ and ‘I wills’. It is waking up each morning and choosing your spouse again and again.

You love each other fiercely and gently as needed. You are open. You are honest. You are intimate.

You need to do these things when you are tired and don’t feel like it.

When you are angry.

When you are upset.

When you are stressed out.


As a married couple you should put your marriage first. Protect it. Keep it safe and nourished. Show the world you are a united front. Speak well of each other at all times. Keep God in your marriage and seek His guidance in all things.


In future blog posts I will discuss my thoughts in depth on marriage, husbands and wives. For this post, however, I was just thinking about marriage in a general way and wanted to talk about it. Guess what? That means you get to listen!  I have had too many conversations of late that make me worried and sad about what marriage has become. It is seen as disposable, transient.  People get married and call it their 1st marriage…what does that imply? I notice that when many couples fight they threaten divorce.  Divorce is a word that should be taboo in your marriage. It plants a seed.  I am by no means saying that there are not serious reasons that would make seperation or divorce the right choice.  However, a large percentage of couples separate or divorce simply because they are not willing to bend, or fight for, or sacrifice, or work at it.  So why marry in the first place?  I struggle to understand.  I don’t honestly know if I ever will.

For me there is no greater joy, comfort or peace than to share my life with the man that I love.  Facing life together, hand in hand.



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